This Christmas is my 22nd year of being a mom. For 22 years I have tried to make the perfect Christmas for my family.
I had a mother who did a marvelous Christmas and gave us many beautiful traditions that I have tried to continue for my children.
Any mother would tell you that Christmas time is usually completely exhausting, and sometimes not very fun.
This year I wasn't feeling it....AT ALL. I felt like everything was too much. The presents, the decorating, all of the pressures that come with keeping up with the traditions.
Instead of powering through and doing "all the things" that make Christmas special. I did something different, I was completely honest and vulnerable with how I was feeling with my family.
Do you know what happened? My honesty changed everything.
Nobody thought I was being selfish by telling them I didn't feel like I could just power through.
Instead, I got genuine support and understanding. My daughter took over the decorating. My husband said he would take over all the gift shopping for the six kids (which is a BIG undertaking).
I completely let go of the reigns and it has been the best gift.
Nobody has died, nothing has gone wrong, in fact, my husband has said he has really enjoyed being Santa be and might do it every year.
It has been marvelous. Letting go of the pressure I put on myself, brought on by my own expectations to please others,
has brought me a gift this season that I have never experienced in this way.
The things I am doing this Christmas, have been chosen out of pure motives and not people-pleasing.
I have been able to be completely present. I have been relaxed. I have focused on what I wanted to and not what I think is expectant of me.
My being present has been a much better gift for my family than any "perfect tradition" that I felt like I needed to do to have the perfect Christmas.
I give credit to being able to give this gift by what I have learned in becoming a coach. The skill of being mindful and understanding how emotional health works have changed my life.
I have learned to be honest on a whole new level that has changed my relationships to a new depth of love and understanding.
I can look at myself with more compassion and love and that has given me the skill to look at others in that same light.
I have learned to look at my life and to question beliefs that might not be bringing me joy.
I'm so grateful for the coaching and training I have received. It has helped me experience my life how I choose to vs. living my life to please others.
This Christmas if you want to get more joy out of all the many things you do, hire yourself a coach, there are many great ones out there.
If you think it is a gift for yourself it actually is a gift for your entire family, just ask my husband!
If you would like to try coaching, I invite you to sign up for a free session with me and see how it really is life-changing.