Thanksgiving is next week. I love Thanksgiving. I come from a large family and our gatherings usually involve 40-50 people. These gatherings are crazy and loud, but I love every minute of it.
Our group is filled with imperfect people, strong personalities, and lots of opinions. This generally could lead to chaos and has the potential to create situations that produce drama.
But not for me.
I have learned to love each one of those people for exactly who they are and for how they show up in the world.
You know why? Because I have learned the secret of the universe on how to have amazing relationships with even the most "challenging" people.
Is your Thanksgiving gathering going to include people that you would consider "challenging" personalities?
I promise you, once you realize the secret to relationships those "challenging" personalities become a lot easier to love and you began to really enjoy spending time with them.
You might think that those people are challenging because of the way they act. But I'm hear to challenge you on that theory.
What makes a relationship challenging? A challenging person, right? Wrong.
If I told you that it's your thoughts about that person vs. what that person does, would you believe me?
When we think of difficult relationships we have in our lives, nine times out of ten, we are automatically going to blame the difficulty on the other person.
This makes us feel powerless.
But I want teach you how to take back your power. Stop blaming the other person for how you are feeling around them.
One of the hardest situations that you will come up against is your desire to change how the other person is acting.
We want people to act in a certain way so we can feel better being around them.
You can not control how other people act. I have never enjoyed it when someone has tried to control my actions, have you?
What can you control? You get to control how you are feeling around them. That you have complete control over.
You may not like it how they act. So that might create a thought of judgment. That thought then creates a feeling of dislike, hate, dread, or anxiety.
But guess what, you are the only one who feels those feelings. And feeling dislike for another human being has never felt good.
The first step to the secret is becoming aware that your thinking is causing your dislike and therefore your negative feeling.
The second step is being deliberate and conscious of how you want to think and therefore feel around others, especially the most "challenging' people.
What is surprising, is as soon as you have more awareness, people become a lot easier to love.
I promise you this works. Having such a large family has given me plenty of practice!
Sometimes we get stuck in our own story and pain. We need help cleaning out our own brain so we can create the exact experience we want in any relationship.
Even the most difficult. This is why coaching is so valuable.
I teach you how to gain back your power and gain freedom.
If you would like to coach with me, please book an introductory session https://www.jeniehuntercoaching.com/book-online.